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Tuesday, October 11, 2016

The Secret About Negativity

You've probably noticed it. It isn't exactly subtle. Whether you it hits you from the news, from social media or interactions with people you thought were friends, we seem to be almost drowning in negativity.

It isn't that people hold different opinions about what is best for their country and their lives, it is the venom with which those opinions are expressed that are concerning. People always vigorously defend their beliefs. We all do it with all beliefs. Once we decide to believe something, we work to prove ourselves "right." We ignore evidence to the contrary. We distort evidence to prove our beliefs right. And we generalize from one event so that it applies to all.

Again, we ALL do it with ALL our beliefs. What I find disturbing is the negativity which surrounds us on all sides. Whether the negativity is expressed through a focus on problems and what isn't going well, or whether it descends into name-calling, threats and violence, all the negativity has an impact. A harmful impact.

We are affected, not only by words, but by the emotions behind them. How do we know? There have been studies demonstrating it.

Studies by Dr. Masaru Emoto demonstrated that water molecules respond to the words that are used about them, changing their structure to respond to the message.  If the message is positive and loving, the water molecule changes into beautiful crystalline patterns; if the message is negative, the water molecule becomes deformed and ugly. 

Quantum Physics has shown us that we create our own possibilities in the universe, and that matter responds to us and changes in response to what we envision.

This is powerful.  Since we are mostly water, think about the serious implications of being around negative people who use words to put you down or surround you with that negativity. 

Mental health professionals know that people who are exposed to continual verbal abuse begin to believe what they are told, believing that they aren't worthy of being treated well, believing that they deserve to be belittled. In fact, if the cells of your body are listening in and react to what they are being told, it follows that they may create disease or at least decrease their ability to fight it off.

I am hardly a Pollyanna. I know there is ugliness in the world. I work with people every day who struggle to overcome the ugliness they've experienced so that they can move on. So that they can create a life of happiness and success.

How do you do that? It is vitally important to surround yourself with people who support you and encourage you to be your best. Quite literally, it can be a matter of life or death. While this may sound like an exaggeration, think for a moment about people you have known who have been in hostile, emotionally abusive relationships and the toll it has taken on their health.

If you have been surrounding yourself with people who belittle you and use words to attack you, consider how toxic this is for your health.  Just as you wouldn't stay in an environment where you were breathing toxic chemicals--things that could make you sick or kill you--you shouldn't stay around people who use words or their opinions in toxic ways.  

As much as possible, avoid being around people who are negative.  No matter what their excuse is for it, it isn't good for you. If you can't avoid them completely, limit your time around them, and take steps to counteract the messages they send you by focusing on positives, beauty, humor, love. Think positive thoughts. Say affirmations. Pray. Be grateful. Choose to spend time and be in situations and relationships with people who express positivity and inspiration. Find people to support you and help you realize your potential.

You may not be able to get rid of the negativity currently pervasive in the media and in election campaigns, but you CAN keep it out of your life. Turn off the television. Focus on your own life and how to make it the way you want.

As the Chinese proverb says: "You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building a nest in your hair."

The secret about negativity is not to let it build a nest in your hair. 

 Linda Pucci, Ph.D. is a personal and business coach and trainer. She helps people overcome the obstacles to their success and happiness--including negativity. She has spent the past 38 years helping her clients create the life of their dreams and is grateful for the opportunity. She believes that everyone can solve their life's challenges if they can only access their resources. The Inner Resource Center, LLC helps connect people to their resources again so that they can move forward to a life they love. For more information, contact her at Linda@InnerResourceCenter.com ,


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deshraj deshraj said...

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kk leatherent erprises
goat leather manufacturers, Exporter & Suppliers of finished leather, leather. KK Leather Enterprises is an India based Company in Delhi