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Monday, October 17, 2011

Be Yourself

"You can't base your life on other people's expectations."

~Stevie Wonder 

We've all done it at some point or another--tried to live our lives based on someone else's expectations.  Those people might have been our parents.  Or maybe our peers.  Or a significant other. Most of us have learned the hard way that basing your life on other people's expectations leaves you living someone else's life.  And, just like wearing someone else's shoes, it may not fit very well.  You life needs to be a reflection of you.  It needs to reflect what is important to you, what you are passionate about, what brings you joy (or sorrow).  Each of us is given a life to live, and we deserve to live it to the fullest. 

This week: Take a hard look at how much you are living your life to fit someone else's expectations.  Are you compromising your values to get along? Are you ignoring things you like to do because someone else doesn't feel the same way?  Are you going along to get along?  Are you avoiding long overdue confrontations?  If so, make a decision to be more of yourself.  Do ONE SMALL THING to express something about yourself, regardless of whether or not others approve.

Linda Pucci, Ph.D. is a psychologist, life coach and expert in helping people identify what is most important to them and help them overcome the "need to please." She wants people to live meaningful, purposeful lives and created Discover Your Life's Purpose: 7 Steps to a Life of Meaning & Authenticity, a self help CD/workbook program.  For more information go to http://www.innerresourcecenter.com/ .

5 comments:

Mary Ellen said...

Very sound advice Linda. As you see so well in your profession counting on others for our happiness is fruitless.

Sue Painter said...

Ego drives us to live in other's expectations of ourselves. Sound advice, Linda. And, welcome back!

buildingconfidentleaders.com said...

Linda, I just finished a session with one of my clients direct reports. They each need to read your post in light of today's dialogue. I will be sending it along right after my comments.

I love your posts. You always have the one paragraph of 'thought' followed by the one paragraph of application. I love the consistency and recognize how hard it is to write something brief and meaningful all in the same package.

Jen Bourn said...

Ooooh I did that! My original major in college was Electrical Engineering to please my parents ... then I got real, switched to graphic design, and haven't looked back since!

Tiffany deSilva said...

Words to live by. Couldn't imagine living a life that isn't congruent with me. Authenticity, integrity, and passion are key ingredients for living a full-filling life.